WARNING: Issued to Microwave Users

No urban legend here folks, this is a true story that just happened:

so, no matter what your freaky co-worker tells you, don't EVER microwave eggs no matter how much of her olive oil you use and how wet the paper towel on top is.

i have been nuking eggs all week for breakfast (shut up) and averting miny explosions as i pick out the yolks in tribute to the high cholesterol i inherited. today, however, the trash can over top i warily poked at them could not contain what next splattered all over me, the walls, window and floor. Ouch! that piece barely missed my zit!

PANIC!

this is PUBLIC DOMAIN, folks, and do you know what happens to people for crimes committed in workplace kitchens? unspeakable things and hatred that makes racism feel warm and fuzzy in comparison and venegence by all who find out about it. it only takes ONE lame coworker with too little work to do walking in who will spread the scandle like wildfire and seal your fate for eternity. yep and yr doomed to be the one who stole the milk or nuked the fish or burned the popcorn. forever. and noone will EVER eat your dish at any office potluck heretoforth.

luckily for me, the 409 was nearly back under the sink before mild-mannered man from contact-wording walked in to expressively coin my "eggsplosion". Nobody in contract-wording talks to anybody. whew.

um, is there egg on my face?

Had she walked in, Raymi would have yelled "burn!" (which woulda been hecka appropriate) and made me feel stupid. She's allowed.